Do we need assistance?

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i don’t know if i mentioned this before (hey, i guess i could go back and read my own blog) when i was talking to the guy, Matt, who has already gone through the surrogacy process, he mentioned that he had met another couple who was going through surrogacy at the same time.  they had some discussions, and perhaps kept in touch after the fact (not sure), and it turned out that the second guy and his wife decided to set up a company to help people through the surrogacy process in India.  Matt hadn’t used the company because it hadn’t existed three years ago, but suggested that i contact them to see if it would be beneficial to use them, so i did.

i did some information gathering, like ordering their introductory package via email, then emailing some supplementary questions that i had.  here are some of the things i found:

  • the cost seems to be relatively equal, because i think they get a better rate, because they use on surrogacy clinic exclusively
  • they do assist with Intended Parents (IPs) from any country where surrogacy is legal, according to their package, but upon further questioning, they have only helped about a dozen couples, and their first Canadian IPs are currently in the process, so there isn’t a long track record.  this isn’t to say that they still wouldn’t be helpful, because there are many other aspects that they help with
  • their exclusive clinic is in a smaller town, and we still haven’t decided whether to use a clinic in a smaller community who’s income is likely very heavily supplemented by surrogacy, or a clinic in Mumbai (this is a very big decision in my mind, with many pros and cons, though i don’t really even know what they are)
  • while Matt’s experience was very difficult three years ago, it seems like there is so much more surrogacy in India nowadays, so perhaps the process is more streamlined, therefore, i kinda question whether we would need outside help.
  • in some of the email discussions i have had with clinics, it seems like they help you through the process too, so i am not sure if we would need the help.  however, it may be in a clinic’s interest to keep us in India longer (if we were staying at associated hotels, or if the baby was in hospital, etc.).  that said, maybe this assistance agency has some of the same motivations for keeping us in India (gawd, i feel i am super suspicious about this whole thing sometimes)
  • to put it bluntly, in reading the paperwork from this agency, i feel like i am more organized than they are and i am not at all intimidated by the medical field, so do i need my hand held?

it seems i came away from that exchange with more questions than answers, and that seems to be a theme with this whole process.  i know though, that i am very organized and do lots of research to ensure things go well, and there will be a bunch of this process that i (we, none of us) will have any control over, so there needs to be a bit of “roll with the punches” attitude, or i will just be Stressica Simpson, so while i am putting a lot of thought into it, i am not putting too much thought into it, or i would make myself crazy.

on a different note, hubby has fallen in love with a certain baby carrier, and i can just imagine him with a wee bundle on his chest.

on yet another note, the team cheering for us to try for twins seems to be getting bigger, so maybe we will need two of these bad boys to cart around bundles.  at this point, i still don’t think we are going to “try” for twins, but are open to getting two if two happen to be successful.  there’s still lots of time yet though, so another thing to stay tuned for.

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