i have to say it’s been a bit difficult to think of halloweens that could have been. one of the things i looked forward to quite a bit, when imagining having a kiddo, was all the fun things we could have done at holiday times and special occasions. halloween is my favourite, so of course when we were contemplating surrogacy, i thought often of babies in costumes out trick-or-treating. and easter egg hunts and christmas mornings and birthdays and whatever other fun activities we could think of…
even early on in the blog i had posted some cute kids in costumes…
oh well… i am sure this will fade eventually, and i am sure we aren’t feeling it as acutely as others who had wanted for longer and tried for longer.
that’s it, just had to lament for a sec. carry on 🙂
so, it’s Canadian Thanksgiving today, and basically it has been all weekend, with a couple of family dinners to go to, lots of good food to eat, and lots of visiting. i have, however, had a few moments to think about what i am thankful for this year, reflecting on the last twelve months.
the biggest joy is my husband. the “surrogacy thing” was our hugest challenge to date in the last 11 years we have known each other, and i am so grateful for how well we came out the other side of this experience. i have to say, we are even stronger than before. i am more confident in his love for me, and mine for him. i hate to wax corny, but we truly have that kind of love that you don’t always find these days, that kind where 11 years later, through thick and thin and lots of challenges, we still hold hands, make funny faces and noises at each other, call each other ridiculous pet names, and enjoy each others’ company nearly constantly. the “surrogacy thing” did not change that about us, didn’t create uncomfortable conversations or moments of silent thought that we don’t want to share. we are ok, we made it, we are still happy and in love.
i am grateful for him and for us, we are enough!
happy Canadian Thanksgiving to everyone.